Thursday, October 3, 2013

Hello Everyone,
    Since I have moved back to Missouri I've been trying to keep my mind busy.  Paul and I work together on our hobbies. It helps me to work my mind and my hands. We have much in common and our lives have kind of paralleled each other. It makes easier for us to live together. He is my best friend and I am very happy to have him back in my life. Our sleeping habits are horrible.  Three hours here and there, sometimes four. We are usually up at 2 a.m. having a nerf war. When I first got here I was still in the wheelchair full time. He cooks, cleans, and shops for us. At first he would have to help me take a bath. Paul has watched me succeed in progressing from wheelchair to walker to cane. Now I can take a bath alone, cook sometimes, and help clean. When I take a shower I have to wait until he can watch out for me because I am still not that sturdy on my feet. It helps a lot that he is there for me physically and mentally. No two people with this disease have the same issues or symptoms. Paul is having a hard time understanding my insecurities about the way I look and move and talk. This causes most of our fights. He wants to go do things and wants me to go along. I start freaking out about my hair, face, and body. Then of course there is the fact that for me to go out I have to go in the wheelchair. All of this has finally caused a big rift between us. My depression has gotten more intense. I am at the point that nothing is helping out of this mood. Everyday has become a battle within to find a purpose to go on....
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